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Old 03-18-2011, 01:02 PM   #1
CateP
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Default Space, Privacy and Isolation-The Search

Now that we've had a few days to think about our latest visit to the lakes region and looked at a whole bunch of houses in different areas, I'm wondering about distances and rural locations.

We saw one house that we loved. It was out on Chemung Rd. in Meredith past Lake Wickwas. Beautiful property, but it felt "out there." It seemed like it took a long time to get there from downtown Laconia, but it was actually only about 10 miles.

What I am wondering is...does it take awhile to get used to how far things are away? Are things actually closer than you think, once you get used to the area? Do you think some locations feel "out there" because we're so used to living in a densely populated area?

We are looking for space and privacy, but not isolation. Interested in your thoughts.
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Old 03-18-2011, 01:26 PM   #2
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Yes you do get used to it. References are subjective too. For example...

In a big city: It's not too far. Just a few blocks away.

In the country: It's not too far. Just two towns over.

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Old 03-18-2011, 01:44 PM   #3
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Default Space, Privacy and Isolation

You have raised a very good topic, and one you will want to 'explore' before you plunk down some real cash for a home.

If you currently live in a relatively densely populated area you have become accustomed to the sounds of population - traffic, animals, people, and you have also become accustomed to being able to go to the store most anytime you want, at the drop of a hat, several times a day if need be the case (or not). Moving to NH and opting to live in a rather private setting may change these customs to which you have become accustomed. If you live away from Town you may find that you have to bundle your errands so you make only one trip to Town - for groceries, retail, personal, medical, banking, whatever shopping you need to do. This will be a habit change.

Also, as mentioned in the "generator" discussion, quite possibly the more rural you are to more prone you are to power failures, and the lower you are on the repair totem pole.

If you expect visitors it is just that much more difficult to give them directions to you home. It happens.

Now, maybe you want to live a hermit life style, so rural wouldn't be too bad, but after reading your posts these last several months I get the feeling you want to be active and relatively close to things to do. Under these circumstances you might look very hard for a home near Town, but isolated by way of landscaping.

"Cabin fever" can be a real thing up here, both physically and mentally, so it may be a good thing to at least be able to see civilization from your new home.

Good Luck.
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Old 03-18-2011, 02:42 PM   #4
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It just happens that recently my wife and I did a drive by of a house for sale on Chemung Road. We are both retired but active and spend little time actually at home daytime but are always coming and going (horse barn, Fay's boat yard, hiking, and so on). While we both are from rural environments, the location felt isolated to us. Looked like a lot of driving in and out, in and out, and so on.
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Old 03-18-2011, 02:58 PM   #5
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Default My little town

Moved to Wolfeboro 7 years ago and my wife still works in Waltham.
I make the trip every week myself for a mid week visit. I have to say traveling Rt 16 down to Rt 95 is far better than Rt 93. It's 2 hours to Waltham. Rt 93 seems to have alot more traffic issues on a regular basis.

Alton would put you at least 20 minutes closer. Route 11 to Route 16 can be a long drive but you won't find many drivers going 45 MPH, I would say 65 MPH is average.

Downtown Wolfeboro traffic has it's moments but you quickly learn how to navigate without it being a big problem.
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Old 03-18-2011, 04:38 PM   #6
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It just happens that recently my wife and I did a drive by of a house for sale on Chemung Road. We are both retired but active and spend little time actually at home daytime but are always coming and going (horse barn, Fay's boat yard, hiking, and so on). While we both are from rural environments, the location felt isolated to us. Looked like a lot of driving in and out, in and out, and so on.
Interesting. It felt like we were going deep into woods on Chemung. In fact the road turns to dirt not too far from the house we were looking at. We are very outdoorsey people and love nature. We don't need to see civilization from our house, but we don't want to be too far from it either. We will be very active in the area (going to Holderness, sailing around smaller lakes in my Sunfish, fishing). And yes we do want to have people over to the house.
The Chemung house had a great layout and little pond and was right down the street from the public launch at Wickwas. But then I thought about what it may be like at night out there and it felt kinda creepy to me. Not afraid of animals in the least, but maniacs in the woods (Seen too many movies).
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Old 03-18-2011, 04:42 PM   #7
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Moved to Wolfeboro 7 years ago and my wife still works in Waltham.
I make the trip every week myself for a mid week visit. I have to say traveling Rt 16 down to Rt 95 is far better than Rt 93. It's 2 hours to Waltham. Rt 93 seems to have alot more traffic issues on a regular basis.

Alton would put you at least 20 minutes closer. Route 11 to Route 16 can be a long drive but you won't find many drivers going 45 MPH, I would say 65 MPH is average.

Downtown Wolfeboro traffic has it's moments but you quickly learn how to navigate without it being a big problem.
Wolfeboro is a gem, but my partner is working over at the Naswa in Laconia and we already checked out the daily drive. Sadly, a little too long for a daily, year-round commute.

After a lot of thought, forum discussion and touring around, we have narrowed down our towns to Gilford, Meredith and some parts of Laconia.
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Old 03-18-2011, 05:03 PM   #8
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Default How do you define space and privacy?

I understand isolation but not space and privacy. I mean do you want to see someone pulling out of their driveway and asking how Tracy's pneumonia is? Would they ask if there is anything they can cook while you are off in Waltham? Do you want to know others in your neighborhood? I mean I am the type that makes friends with a couple who rent for a week next door to me each year and ask them over for lunch. I like to see others swimming or boating not all that far away but not on top of me. I would not want to be alone on any great amount of space for sure. Now you are a couple, but one of you or the other of you may be off at work in Weirs or the Science Center or Waltham etc. I also personally like to see a few lights in windows and know that there are a few hearty souls that are there in winter when I go up to the simple little home that I love so much.

From what I have seen of you so far Cate, you and Tracy are not isolationists for sure. Well I guess I don't know on Tracy. Heck at one time I think there were at least four threads started by you on the board. Maybe more. I think of you as liking to interact with others. I mean you have all but become the topic of the day here. After you seemed to disappear after your visit last weekend, I was wondering if any other Forum members were missing your posts and hearing what you were up to and what questions you had now etc.

Here's the thing. Past behavior is the best indicator of future behavior. Do you participate in neighborhood activities? Do you go to area fairs etc. I would think that you would be a joiner. So you are not going to be isolated in your work hours or volunteer hours. It is in your home that you may be way off from others? In New Hampshire? In the winter? Are you sure? No smoke coming out of the chimney up the hill? No one to ask about the trailor. For someone considering not being at all near to people, look at all the people you ask for opinions? Does this change when you are settled? I guess you can just continue to come here for any questions. The Forum is a great source of information. It is not quite the same as talking to a real person in real life that you just passed while walking with the dogs? That is more like, You say, "Did you hear that loud noise last night?" Then the other person says, "Yes I did! What do you think it was?" See what I mean?

I want to be able to know that there are others at the lake making the daily journey with me and mine. I do not know how you feel. How many acres do you need? I mean the more acres you get the farther away from others you are. So you have to only decide what is privacy and what is isolation I guess. Mileage is not going to change. Is driving down a long road away from other people and other things what you want? You might get used to it. But it is not going to become shorter mileage.

So Saturday you get up and you want to make the Post Office before noon and you get back home again ready for more of the day. Whoops a friend calls and you ask them over for dinner with you and Tracy. You thought you had what you needed but you remember that this friend is a vegetarian and has also has food allergies. So no problem. Off you go back to town to get what you need. When you return one of the dogs is out of pills. How did that happen? You thought Tracy got them yesterday. Tracy goes off to get them. This can go on and on a bit in life. What about long distances to things that you rely on is going to get shorter? You may be super organized. Looking at how you plan for a move, I would bet that you are. However in life, things change. You are at an age where the world is at the tip of your fingers. The thing is that as you age, sometimes your fingers get a bit gnarled. And then the road seems a lot longer and a lot harder. There is something to be said for being able to get what you need, especially when you get older and maybe your eyes see less well etc. I know you are still young. But planning ahead in a house purchase where there can be difficult winters and one of you alone at times, will bring dividends in ten or twenty years.

Last edited by Lucky1; 03-18-2011 at 07:00 PM.
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Old 03-18-2011, 06:33 PM   #9
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Originally Posted by CateP View Post
....We saw one house that we loved. It was out on Chemung Rd. in Meredith past Lake Wickwas. Beautiful property, but it felt "out there." It seemed like it took a long time to get there from downtown Laconia, but it was actually only about 10 miles.
.
Something you have to get used to up here, unless you moved to downtown Meredith/Laconia/Wolfeboro. You go from the city to the country real fast. You get used to it and plan....if you forget the spaghetti sauce and the sidewalks are rolled up... oh well, you think of a substitute


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...We are looking for space and privacy, but not isolation. Interested in your thoughts.
Give and take: I'd prefer privacy year around, this time of year is unique, your impression of isolation will change when the Summer arrives, really, wait and see
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Old 03-18-2011, 06:46 PM   #10
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......I have to say traveling Rt 16 down to Rt 95 is far better than Rt 93. It's 2 hours to Waltham. Rt 93 seems to have alot more traffic issues on a regular basis.
To Waltham from the west side of the lake, route 93 would be used only down through the Hooksett toll below Concord. There route 3 splits off from 93 and is much better for a morning commute to Waltham. It does involve another toll, but it runs down through Nashua and dumps onto route 128 (also I-95) about five miles west of where 93 intersects 128. The first four miles of that piece of 128 can be rather congested in the morning, as can the stretch of 93 from Andover down to 128.

In the evening, coming out of Waltham, you'd want to take route 3 back up. Sure, the half dozen or so miles from Waltham to 3 can be congested in the evening, but the stretch from just past 3 over to 93 isn't something I'd wish on anyone.
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Old 03-18-2011, 07:22 PM   #11
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I understand isolation but not space and privacy. I mean do you want to see someone pulling out of their driveway and asking how Tracy's pneumonia is? Would they ask if there is anything they can cook while you are off in Waltham? Do you want to know others in your neighborhood? I mean I am the type that makes friends with a couple who rent for a week next door to me each year and ask them over for lunch. I like to see others swimming or boating not all that far away but not on top of me. I would not want to be alone on any great amount of space for sure. Now you are a couple, but one of you or the other of you may be off at work in Weirs or the Science Center or Waltham etc. I also personally like to see a few lights in windows and know that there are a few hearty souls that are there in winter when I go up to the simple little home that I love so much.

Here's the thing. Past behavior is the best indicator of future behavior. Do you participate in neighborhood activities? Do you go to area fairs etc. I would think that you would be a joiner. So you are not going to be isolated in your work hours or volunteer hours. It is in your home that you may be way off from others? In New Hampshire? In the winter? Are you sure? No smoke coming out of the chimney up the hill? No one to ask about the trailor. For someone considering not being at all near to people, look at all the people you ask for opinions? Does this change when you are settled? I guess you can just continue to come here for any questions. The Forum is a great source of information. It is not quite the same as talking to a real person in real life that you just passed while walking with the dogs? That is more like, You say, "Did you hear that loud noise last night?" Then the other person says, "Yes I did! What do you think it was?" See what I mean?

How many acres do you need? I mean the more acres you get the farther away from others you are. So you have to only decide what is privacy and what is isolation I guess. Mileage is not going to change. Is driving down a long road away from other people and other things what you want? You might get used to it. But it is not going to become shorter mileage.

This can go on and on a bit in life. What about long distances to things that you rely on is going to get shorter? You may be super organized. Looking at how you plan for a move, I would bet that you are. However in life, things change. You are at an age where the world is at the tip of your fingers. The thing is that as you age, sometimes your fingers get a bit gnarled. And then the road seems a lot longer and a lot harder. There is something to be said for being able to get what you need, especially when you get older and maybe your eyes see less well etc. I know you are still young. But planning ahead in a house purchase where there can be difficult winters and one of you alone at times, will bring dividends in twenty years.
Thank you Lucky1 for this thoughtful post . As usual you bring some good ideas to the conversation. I want to respond to few things. First is that we're not looking to be completely away from people. When I think of privacy, I am thinking my neighbors can't see in our windows. The house is set back from the street a bit. As for space, 2-4 acres is very nice. We want room for the doggies to run around.

Where I grew up we had about 4 acres and you couldn't see the house from the road, but I could yell through the woods to my next door neighbor friend and our walkie talkies were in range of one another. (pre-cell phone days) Behind our house there was a path through the woods that led to a pond. You could see filtered views of other houses on the path, but you felt like you were in nature.

I like the idea of neighborhood, but with trees or a buffer between the houses. I could see us up on Belknap Mountain Rd. in Gilford and driving down to the village to meet and greet...or going to some community thing in town. Same with some places in Meredith.

As for consolidating runs to the store and errands, I think that is a much better way to live. Less gas, less pollution. We are not trying to simulate what we have now as far as convenience or shopping. In fact we want to do a whole lot LESS shopping and more DOING. I think it's nice to take a scenic drive to the store. Nothing like a mountain view to give you perspective.

And yes, we are looking towards the future when we are not so spry, but we may want to downsize again and go for the no maintenance condo.
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Old 03-19-2011, 07:35 AM   #12
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I live in southern NH, so things are a bit more crowded down here, but my neighborhood is 5 to 50 acre wooded lots and the houses are 300 to 500 feet apart. I can see my neighbor's homes and it's nice to know I can count on my nieghbors for help and vice-versa, but they are far enough away that there's plenty of privacy. I'm about 2 miles from good local shopping and 20 miles from two major shopping hubs (Portsmouth and Manchester). I'm also almost adjacent to a 5500 acre state park, so there's more than enough wilderness to explore.

I also have property in Maine that's about 8 miles from local shopping and 25 miles from shopping hubs. There's a 1.5 mile stretch of road with no houses between my place and the main road. The houses nearest me are almost entirely seasonal-use (they are used in mostly in the Summer, but they are not seasonal homes). There's thousands of acres of woodland in trust (no construction but timber harvesting is allowed) adjacent to my property and the wilderness is nice, but it is incredibly lonely and isolated, especially in Winter.

I think my place in southern NH is perfectly situated and I highly recommend looking for something in the area you want to live with similar logistics.
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Old 03-19-2011, 07:56 AM   #13
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If you want peace, quiet and privacy and like wildlife, I would pull the trigger on the Chemung property. We live close to that area (Meredith Center) and love it. We rarely even lock our doors. Violent crime is almost unheard of in this area and when it does occur, it is either a domestic dispute or involves people who know each other. We have an alarm system to protect against a break-in when we're away.......that's about the only crime you have to be concerned with in a rural area.
Wicwas is a pristine lake, you're likely to stumble onto a moose feeding in the shallows as we have a few times.
You would be about 15 minutes from Meredith/Laconia/I93 and there is a nice shortcut (Winona Rd) to Holderness/Squam Lakes area.
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Old 03-19-2011, 10:01 AM   #14
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Default If it's what you want...

...then just plain do it.

If in your heart (you and Tracy) you want the quiet and rural life, then just do it.

We moved to NH (I spent summers from my infant years at the lake) to make our home in 1996, having moved from Clifton Park NY. Clifton Park is a town of about 36,000 with no PD (sheriffs and State Police) and about 4 or 5 Vol FD's. You didn't say that you lived in south Clifton Park, you would say that you lived at Exit 8, exit 9, exit 10 etc off the Northway. We could run to Hannaford's or Market basket in 5 minutes. It was a bedroom community for Albany and Schenectedy, and was wall to wall subdivisions.

When we moved here, at the beginning of May, we found we had a 20-30 minute drive to a decent sized grocery store, and longer to a mall. It took us a while to adjust to this, like maybe June or perhaps July , and we have never lived back. We live about a half mile off Alton Bay, on 3/4 acre of land, mostly wooded. We have a back porch that overlooks our brook, and that is where we spend most of our time in the summer.

Up here in the summer, you have Meadowbrook for entertainment, and smaller venues like coffee shops, 40 minutes or so to Concord and the Capitol Center, and about an hour to Manchester and the Verizon Center (entertainment, hockey, Concerts) or the FisherCats Baseball.

In short, if you want peace and quiet, rural pleasures, then as Nike says, "Just do it", and the rest will fall in place.

Enjoy, and an early welcome to the Lakes Region.
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Old 03-19-2011, 01:25 PM   #15
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Default Saturday in NJ

You know I was doing some thinking while driving around doing my errands at the Jersey Shore this morning and decided that the question of space, privacy and isolation is really rather subjective. I like hearing from people who have moved from densely populated areas and made a new home in the lakes region. Yes, there are adjustments, but none of it sounds bad in the least.

I clocked my drive to Target and it was 4 miles. I got there in about 15 minutes. Very convenient, BUT there was absolutely no scenery along the drive and it was jam packed with impatient people who were racing through the day. Some call it a "cluster $@#$!" It was not fun. It was stressful.

While driving around I imagined going home to a beautiful quiet yard with the Chickadees chirping and the spring winds sighing through the trees. I imagined working on some video project or figuring out how to make stick furniture in my little workshop for a few hours. I imagined taking the doggies for an afternoon walk in the woods with my beautiful partner and getting them all tired out. And then I imagined getting ready for a nice dinner out with friends and having...hmm lobster macaroni and cheese...?

I think for us the privacy and space is about having a choice of when we want to socialize versus socializing once you step outside your door. (like we do now). I like the idea of being close enough to a neighbor to ask for help if needed and we will look for that, but I don't think we need 10 neighbors. A few people down the street is fine.

I really wish we had more time to just drive around and get a sense of distances from Point A to Point B when we came up, but we were on a tight schedule and had to see a LOT of houses. It was truly whirlwind. When Tracy moves up to Laconia in a few weeks she's going to drive around on her day off and do the Point A to Point B drives (house to stores) and let me know how it feels.

Bottom line...I think that how one perceives the space, privacy and isolation of any given location in the lakes region can be very subjective.
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Old 03-19-2011, 01:45 PM   #16
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You need to come back and look at houses again in another month. Once the leaves are back on the trees and the woods fill in, everything you saw will look different. Anything that looked isolated to you will be more so once spring comes. My neighborhood is exactly two miles from the Wolfeboro Inn. We're on a quiet little street with lots of 2 to 3 acres with a few lots of 5 to 7 acres. I can see my neighbors homes on either side of me right now, but once spring is in full bloom, I see nothing but trees and nature from every side of my home. I feel like I'm alone in the country, yet there are neighbors who are also wonderful friends close by.

It takes me less than five minutes to be in the center of town doing whatever I need or want to do there. I live in a very convenient to everything location. For instance, I left my house this AM a few minutes after 10, went downtown and stopped at the bank, the Hallmark Store to buy some cards, and the post office for stamps. I then headed out on Rt. 28 to go to a 10:30 Jazzercise class across from Parson's furniture. Class was over at 11:30, I stopped at the IGA on my way home to pick up a few things and was back home at 11:55. I wouldn't have accomplished all that in that amount of time and distance when I lived in NJ in a community about an hour from NYC!!!!

We're heading to a movie in Gilford this afternoon. It takes us 45 minutes to get there and we'll stop for dinner at Ellacoya Barn and Grille. We don't live in isolation at all, yet I have total privacy and country living in my close to town neighborhood.
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Old 03-19-2011, 03:38 PM   #17
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Cool Get a convertible and enjoy the drive

What you need is a convertible. We live off Moultonboro Neck Road and love the area we're in, but we're 20 miles from downtown Laconia and Wolfeboro. Last summer I worked out of Weirs Beach. It was a 15 minute commute. When the temp is 50° and the sun is out, the top goes down, even if I have to run the heat and put on gloves. I honestly don't mind driving along side the lake with the top down to get to and from work. It's part of the lake lifestyle we've come to love.
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Old 03-19-2011, 06:23 PM   #18
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Default A whole different world!

I grew up in the Chemung/Meredith Center area, and it was great...except when it wasn't. It's just a little bit too far from everything. On the other hand, we knew all of our neighbors, the Center Store is fantastic, Wicwas is still sort of a secret (shhhh!), and you get used to the drive. Good luck in whatever you choose!
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Old 03-19-2011, 10:50 PM   #19
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Old 03-20-2011, 10:10 AM   #20
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Hey CateP - isn't it great to have a source like the great people of the Forum and get all the answers to those pressing move questions? Welcome to the Lakes Region (soon!) and I wish you the best of luck finding the "perfect place". You’ll know it when you see it – that’s what happened to me and I still love my house and where I live.

The other posters to this thread have brought up some great perspectives and I might be able to give you another one! I moved up here full-time 8 years ago, having been here every summer for 2 weeks for 20 years because I knew this was where I wanted to early retire. For months in advance of buying, I spent inordinate amounts of time, indulging myself reading every part of this Forum. I wondered if there would there be anything going on here in the winter so reading the Events Calendar certainly put that question to rest (and it has been borne out over the last 8 years) - this region has tons of stuff happening all year round. You sometimes have to become accustomed to different "open" hours/days in the winter for some of the shops but it becomes second nature to you. Here you can be out of the “rat race”, away from noise, near to nature, and yet still be part of a lovely village.

I lived in a variety of towns and cities throughout my work life all over the Eastern part of the USA, but I am a New England girl at heart. Having lived in a variety of places, I knew the ins and outs - positive and negative - of each type of location. Here, I live ~8 miles from the main highway and I can honestly say that to this day, I never tire of the drive to/from town - I always find something new to see (even after 20 + 8 years!) The only thing I find annoying is the condition of the road in winter (giant frost heaves and valleys). One also needs to watch out for deer especially during certain parts of the year. But, being able to put back my car's sunroof and to smell the fresh, clean, woodsy smell on a sunny day, even in winter, while I drive this scenic road is a "gift".

Do I consolidate my trips to town - yes, and I do one side of the road going to town and the other coming back! I love the shops here (and wait for longer trips to other parts of the state for the big dept. stores) and if you shop often enough, the storekeepers and restaurant servers get to know you. There's something special about that - they remember what you like and know you by face or name. The first winter I was here I needed a special craft piece for something and when I went to pay for it, it was just given to me - no charge! I have also noticed that in contrast to some of the places I've lived, people here are noticeably more mannerly and open and extroverted and smile at you even if they don’t know you! This area is a place where you can be by yourself if you want to, or go out to places if you want to, or join in local activities – it is what you make of it.

I also want to bring up something you might not have focused on - access to health care – it’s not as if you’re in near proximity to Boston’s great hospitals but they are only 2 and ˝ hours away; in addition, you also have access to Dartmouth Hitchcock, Concord Hospital, Elliot Hospital, and the Catholic Medical Center (for heart problems). Locally, I think there are some wonderful health care professionals and a good hospital, Lakes Region General Hospital, as well as excellent emergency care responders. Shortly after I came here my father took ill (from a chronic condition) on a visit here with my mother – he was taken to LRGH and put in the care of an outstanding doctor who totally focused on my father and helped us through a very trying time – Dad eventually passed away after 18 very long days but not without the doctor trying everything and leveling with us at the appropriate points. I cannot say enough about him (the dr.) and the special, gentle care the nurses at LRGH took with him, as well as with us, the family, as we came day by day. Their kindness and thoughtfulness, their sense of humor at funny times, and their welcome embrace when it all got to be too much we will always remember.

Well, I have gone on and on but just wanted to bring up a few more points! Best of luck, CateP!
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