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[Gilligan]

My screen name is Gilligan:

Grab a seat and sit right back. Here is my tale if you can believe it. I’ve been on this forum for several years and around the Lake even longer. My name is Bob. Denver is where I was born and raised.

I seem to have a problem. I have many vivid dreams centered on the same impossible situations. In these visions I am part of a small group of people stranded on an uncharted desert isle. It gets weirder. In my fantasy, no matter how hard I try I don’t seem to be able to do anything right.

I try to understand the deep underlying causes of these recurring visions. Maybe it is due to a lack of navigation skills. Why am I stranded on a desert island that, in my delusional fantasy, is overgrown with lush tropical vegetation? Why is the beach the only place with sand on a desert island? Could the huts, tropical surroundings I envision actually be a desert mirage? It is quite a conundrum.

All during these chronic drawn-out hallucinations I have absolutely no libido and it seems like everyone I imagine I see on this island is celibate. Why do I see myself always wearing the same outfit with long sleeves in tropical hot weather? Others in the group never wear the same outfit twice. One girl wears hot pants and a midriff shirt. Holy Mary! Another woman gingerly wears long sparkley gowns and dresses. Reminds me of a famous model or a movie star.

There is an inane, somewhat oblivious, high society Yacht-Club couple along and I have no idea how they fit in. They are very formal and lovey-dovey and she has a big beautiful wardrobe and he reminds me of Mr. Magoo. There’s also a big husky domineering fellow who is always around me. He hugs me often and calls me his “Little Buddy”. He thinks he’s my captain and wants me to sleep in his shack (not that there’s anything wrong with that). Once I grew up though, I thought I’d never again have to sleep in an upper bunk.

Potential rescuers just pop up magically on this imaginary island and then they disappear. Every week I howl after we just miss getting saved. No BoatUS in my dreams!

I actually have vivid flashbacks of these dreams while I’m awake. This impossible scenario is especially strong when I’m watching my old TV. The visions take over the TV set and it’s like I’m watching my hallucinations. By now you must be wondering if my mental state is alcohol induced. Nope, the strongest thing I drink is ginger ale or coconut milk.

An inventive professor believes my mental condition is the result of frequently helping a neighbor, Timmy Leary with his chemistry experiments back in my bongo playing beatnik days. For those x-gens, back in the ‘50’s beatniks were the non-conformists and a prequel to the substance-enjoying, free-spirited hippies of the ‘60’s and ‘70’s.

Now, I hale from Maynard, MA where I live with my lovey girlfriend Ann and our wrinkle nose pug Zelda. One day, when I am fully cured, I might marry Ann. For pleasure and mental therapy I spend as much time as I can boating on Lake Winnipesaukee. Touring by boat for a few hours without losing sight of land is soothing, comforting and it eases my mind.

My screen name and avatar resemble the way I see myself during these delusional dreams and hallucinations. My therapist says that the Lake and this forum help me to cope with my imaginary life. Contrary to the vision of a desert rain forest, Winnipesaukee and this forum are not figments of my imagination. I’ve been told it takes a lot of WORK (I have trouble saying that word) to deal with my mental health. It’s been over 25 years and my expensive psychotherapist says I might never get rid of these apparitions and cure my phobia of oceans.

Thank you for accepting me here and for your wonderful forum.