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alsadad · 02-02-2012, 07:32 PM

On Friday Lucas Oil Stadium collapses into a heap of brick and rubble. Some sources attribute the collapse to an isolated earthquake while others insist that Vince Wilfork tripped and fell down in the parking lot. The NFL scours the nation, but every possible venue is booked except for the field at Lakes Region High School. The teams immediately depart for Laconia Airport. Unfortunately the planes are diverted to Manchester due to their size and the players arrive in Meredith late Saturday evening after a 2 hour bus ride only to find that all of the hotels are filled with people attending the Pond Hockey Classic.

On Sunday, in a hastily devised pre-game ceremony, that oompah band that rides the trailer in the Center Harbor 4th of July parade performs the national anthem (that’s two gigs for the band this year!), Mr. Flyguy swoops in for the flyover, and Mr. and Mrs. Skydive parachute into the stadium carrying an American flag.

NBC doesn’t have time to relocate its camera crews and equipment, but the day is saved when APS agrees to snap still photos of each play and Don posts them on the Forum just as quickly as possible for the nation to watch. Unfortunately, APS only brings his super-telephoto lens. Consequently, it appears that Patrick Chung is sticking his finger up Eli’s nose on every Giants offensive play, every Brady pass seems to travel a mere six inches to a wide open Wes Welker, and every kickoff looks like 22 GFBLs violating the 150’ rule in Braun Bay.

Despite all of the challenges, it’s a magnificent spectacle. The game comes down to a Gostkowski field goal attempt with 3 seconds left and the score tied at 82. The snap is back, the hold is good, the kick is up, and… OMG -- streakers!! Suddenly a fair-minded group of fans clad in Giants jerseys storm the field in a vain attempt to prevent the disruption. In the mistaken assumption that the Giants fans are attempting to disrupt the kick, an even larger group of Pats fans charge the Giants fans. In the mayhem, the game officials are trampled, the players are reduced to trembling blobs of jelly by the sight of these hardy NH folk charging at them, and no one witnesses the field goal attempt. Roger Goodell dashes on to the field from the improvised Commissioner’s box (the back seat of a partially restored 1935 DeSoto) and snatches the camera from APS in a frantic effort to ascertain the path of the kick but discovers, alas, that the camera was focused on, shall we say, the wrong ball(s).

The photos do prove useful to local law enforcement, however, and on Monday police arrest Les, Hazelnut and ClosetExtrovert (who knew?) for public nudity, disorderly conduct and ice fishing without a license. Before they can be tried, huge crowds gather outside the Meredith Police Station demanding a little mob justice. Realizing they have a significant security problem, Police stash the trio where no one will ever find them – the Obama campaign office in Dixville Notch. The entire debacle might have become nothing more than a bad memory, but Les snaps after just three days without access to the dollar menu and Samiam spots him at the Plymouth McDonalds. The aftermath is just too ugly to contemplate.

02-02-2012, 07:32 PM	#70
alsadad Member Join Date: Sep 2007 Posts: 45 Thanks: 8 Thanked 41 Times in 10 Posts	Prediction On Friday Lucas Oil Stadium collapses into a heap of brick and rubble. Some sources attribute the collapse to an isolated earthquake while others insist that Vince Wilfork tripped and fell down in the parking lot. The NFL scours the nation, but every possible venue is booked except for the field at Lakes Region High School. The teams immediately depart for Laconia Airport. Unfortunately the planes are diverted to Manchester due to their size and the players arrive in Meredith late Saturday evening after a 2 hour bus ride only to find that all of the hotels are filled with people attending the Pond Hockey Classic. On Sunday, in a hastily devised pre-game ceremony, that oompah band that rides the trailer in the Center Harbor 4th of July parade performs the national anthem (that’s two gigs for the band this year!), Mr. Flyguy swoops in for the flyover, and Mr. and Mrs. Skydive parachute into the stadium carrying an American flag. NBC doesn’t have time to relocate its camera crews and equipment, but the day is saved when APS agrees to snap still photos of each play and Don posts them on the Forum just as quickly as possible for the nation to watch. Unfortunately, APS only brings his super-telephoto lens. Consequently, it appears that Patrick Chung is sticking his finger up Eli’s nose on every Giants offensive play, every Brady pass seems to travel a mere six inches to a wide open Wes Welker, and every kickoff looks like 22 GFBLs violating the 150’ rule in Braun Bay. Despite all of the challenges, it’s a magnificent spectacle. The game comes down to a Gostkowski field goal attempt with 3 seconds left and the score tied at 82. The snap is back, the hold is good, the kick is up, and… OMG -- streakers!! Suddenly a fair-minded group of fans clad in Giants jerseys storm the field in a vain attempt to prevent the disruption. In the mistaken assumption that the Giants fans are attempting to disrupt the kick, an even larger group of Pats fans charge the Giants fans. In the mayhem, the game officials are trampled, the players are reduced to trembling blobs of jelly by the sight of these hardy NH folk charging at them, and no one witnesses the field goal attempt. Roger Goodell dashes on to the field from the improvised Commissioner’s box (the back seat of a partially restored 1935 DeSoto) and snatches the camera from APS in a frantic effort to ascertain the path of the kick but discovers, alas, that the camera was focused on, shall we say, the wrong ball(s). The photos do prove useful to local law enforcement, however, and on Monday police arrest Les, Hazelnut and ClosetExtrovert (who knew?) for public nudity, disorderly conduct and ice fishing without a license. Before they can be tried, huge crowds gather outside the Meredith Police Station demanding a little mob justice. Realizing they have a significant security problem, Police stash the trio where no one will ever find them – the Obama campaign office in Dixville Notch. The entire debacle might have become nothing more than a bad memory, but Les snaps after just three days without access to the dollar menu and Samiam spots him at the Plymouth McDonalds. The aftermath is just too ugly to contemplate.

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