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-   -   My Demeanor (https://www.winnipesaukee.com/forums/showthread.php?t=19555)

That Guy 07-24-2015 07:29 AM

My Demeanor
 
Because of what seemed like forum suicide, I just wanted to take a moment and explain a few things.

Being on the internet for the past 20 years or so has taught me a few things. One being do not get upset by what other people say to me. I can just laugh it off. In more recent years, I've been on particular forums that have told me to drink bleach, have insulted my family, twice my number was dug up via a Verizon employee and my number put on CL under the M4M section, pictures of my wedding were found, and my street address was displayed for all to see. Because of those things, I have been pretty hardened to what is said to me, as well as what I say to others. Same goes for in person, but not to the degree as it does online.

I love me a good debate, but I'm set in my ways when it comes to topics such as government, 2A rights, abortion, and my favorite being religion. I can sometimes push the envelope when it comes to getting my point across, and in recent years it has rarely insulted anyone.

As far as these particular forums, I mean no offense to anyone. znh and Dan, my words I expressed yesterday were not directed to you. I used a phrase that was coined about ten years ago to try to make a point, and it insulted you both. For that, I apologize. I actually have years of personal experience with Downs and Autistic children.

In person, I tend to use similar ways to get my point across. If I were to say something was as useless as Anne Frank's drumset, it doesn't mean I hate Jewish people.

I understand these forums are far more timid than where I have spent my recent years, and I will work on that. I feel like Jose from South-Central LA took a roadtrip to Amishville; just need to work on the table manners.

I hope this post clears the air and I apologize to those that I offended. We are a small community of people and there should be a need for us to bicker on such minute things.

I'll take what was said yesterday, and leave it from there.

Quote:

Originally Posted by znh;
Let's just be done with this and move on to more fishing/boating/lake talk...:coolsm:


SAMIAM 07-24-2015 08:07 AM

You're right about the internet. Lots of crazy forums, chats, blogs out there but the Winni Forum is probably the nicest and best run I've ever seen.
No angry confrontations and arguments about religion and politics.
Mostly people with an interest in the lakes exchanging ideas and helping each other.

Pineedles 07-24-2015 08:55 AM

That Guy, I too got in above my head several years ago but have mellowed since. This is not a "normal" forum where insults are hurled back and forth without moderation. Most folks here are looking for information, sharing their experiences on and around the lake, and just generally having fun. I have made some good friendships on this forum and I trust you will too. You're a standup guy to issue this post, and I know that you will settle in here just fine. Have fun and enjoy.

Newbiesaukee 07-24-2015 09:07 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by That Guy (Post 248967)
Because of what seemed like forum suicide, I just wanted to take a moment and explain a few things.

Being on the internet for the past 20 years or so has taught me a few things. One being do not get upset by what other people say to me. I can just laugh it off. In more recent years, I've been on particular forums that have told me to drink bleach, have insulted my family, twice my number was dug up via a Verizon employee and my number put on CL under the M4M section, pictures of my wedding were found, and my street address was displayed for all to see. Because of those things, I have been pretty hardened to what is said to me, as well as what I say to others. Same goes for in person, but not to the degree as it does online.

I love me a good debate, but I'm set in my ways when it comes to topics such as government, 2A rights, abortion, and my favorite being religion. I can sometimes push the envelope when it comes to getting my point across, and in recent years it has rarely insulted anyone.

As far as these particular forums, I mean no offense to anyone. znh and Dan, my words I expressed yesterday were not directed to you. I used a phrase that was coined about ten years ago to try to make a point, and it insulted you both. For that, I apologize. I actually have years of personal experience with Downs and Autistic children.

In person, I tend to use similar ways to get my point across. If I were to say something was as useless as Anne Frank's drumset, it doesn't mean I hate Jewish people.

I understand these forums are far more timid than where I have spent my recent years, and I will work on that. I feel like Jose from South-Central LA took a roadtrip to Amishville; just need to work on the table manners.

I hope this post clears the air and I apologize to those that I offended. We are a small community of people and there should be a need for us to bicker on such minute things.

I'll take what was said yesterday, and leave it from there.

Regardless of the negative connotations that people may attach to the term "political correctness" words DO hurt....sometimes more than sticks and stones.

I accept that you are a well meaning person. Nonetheless, even using the offensive phrase about Anne Frank and then saying this doesn't really mean you hate Jewish people is offensive. Why use the phrase at all?

The same thing goes for the Jose from LA and Amishville. Why say it at all?

Your friends who know and love you may say....oh you know him, he's "that guy."

But people on the internet do not know the wonderful person that you may well be. Please reflect on this and don't blame it on PC. Unless you really are "That Guy."

thinkxingu 07-24-2015 09:13 AM

^ Agreed, but I also appreciate the post. Though I, too, have been on forums for over twenty years and have never had the negative experiences mentioned!

Go TEAM!!!

Sent from my XT1528 using Tapatalk

That Guy 07-24-2015 09:30 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Newbiesaukee (Post 248974)
Regardless of the negative connotations that people may attach to the term "political correctness" words DO hurt....sometimes more than sticks and stones.

I accept that you are a well meaning person. Nonetheless, even using the offensive phrase about Anne Frank and then saying this doesn't really mean you hate Jewish people is offensive. Why use the phrase at all?

The same thing goes for the Jose from LA and Amishville. Why say it at all?

Your friends who know and love you may say....oh you know him, he's "that guy."

But people on the internet do not know the wonderful person that you may well be. Please reflect on this and don't blame it on PC. Unless you really are "That Guy."

Welp. I guess I can't please everyone.

znh 07-24-2015 09:35 AM

Also having been involved in other larger forums I definitely understand how things can go and how people can say things they don't really mean. I certainly never meant to have any of this get to this level and want to continue to help make this forum a good place for people to talk about like minded interests. I have no hard feelings here. Hope everyone else feels the same and we can all meet up for a beer some time on a sunny sandbar and we can talk about rode lengths, loons, kayak fishing, proper grammar, politi...ok maybe we will avoid that subject. Thank you for clarifying everything and posting this...

The Real BigGuy 07-24-2015 10:26 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Newbiesaukee (Post 248974)
Regardless of the negative connotations that people may attach to the term "political correctness" words DO hurt....sometimes more than sticks and stones.

I accept that you are a well meaning person. Nonetheless, even using the offensive phrase about Anne Frank and then saying this doesn't really mean you hate Jewish people is offensive. Why use the phrase at all?

The same thing goes for the Jose from LA and Amishville. Why say it at all?

Your friends who know and love you may say....oh you know him, he's "that guy."

But people on the internet do not know the wonderful person that you may well be. Please reflect on this and don't blame it on PC. Unless you really are "That Guy."

This whole "political correctness" thing really bugs me. I listened to a sports talk show the other day that talked about this for an hour. A SPORTS talk show.

It seems that there is a group of people who spend their time looking for things to be offended by. Every day it seems that we find new things we can't say. The way we are going, pretty soon there won't be a spectrum, just everyone a bland white (can I say that without offending someone?)

Unfortunately, I have no control over how anyone "hears what I am saying. 45 years ago I was interviewed by a sports writer who wrote a piece based on the interview. When I read it I was aghast. It was not at all what I thought I had said. My father told me not to worry, it wouldn't be the first time that people twisted my words to suit their needs/mores/upbringing.

When I use one of George Carlin's 7 deadly words in a burst of angry frustration at my performance of a task, I use it as a venting. This may not be right but, is it right that a person with a strict WASP/Catholic/Jewish/ etc. takes my words and bends them to their more repressed background?

Now, I try and engage my mind and take a look at the surroundings before I say something that may offend anyone. (I sometimes wonder if it is right that I have to try and be just like everyone else.) But I always think that everybody ought to try and be a little more tolerant, take care of their own issues, "skate their lane", and just lighten up!

Just the thoughts of an old guy who has seen a transition that may not be as great as some might think. Life is way to short to have to worry about all of these things.

That Guy 07-24-2015 10:33 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Real BigGuy (Post 248984)
This whole "political correctness" thing really bugs me.[/COLOR] I listened to a sports talk show the other day that talked about this for an hour. A SPORTS talk show.

It seems that there is a group of people who spend their time looking for things to be offended by. Every day it seems that we find new things we can't say. The way we are going, pretty soon there won't be a spectrum, just everyone a bland white (can I say that without offending someone?)

Unfortunately, I have no control over how anyone "hears what I am saying. 45 years ago I was interviewed by a sports writer who wrote a piece based on the interview. When I read it I was aghast. It was not at all what I thought I had said. My father told me not to worry, it wouldn't be the first time that people twisted my words to suit their needs/mores/upbringing.

When I use one of George Carlin's 7 deadly words in a burst of angry frustration at my performance of a task, I use it as a venting. This may not be right but, is it right that a person with a strict WASP/Catholic/Jewish/ etc. takes my words and bends them to their more repressed background?

Now, I try and engage my mind and take a look at the surroundings before I say something that may offend anyone. (I sometimes wonder if it is right that I have to try and be just like everyone else.) But I always think that everybody ought to try and be a little more tolerant, take care of their own issues, "skate their lane", and just lighten up!

Just the thoughts of an old guy who has seen a transition that may not be as great as some might think. Life is way to short to have to worry about all of these things.

I'd have a beer with you.

Bear Islander 07-25-2015 07:17 AM

I'm glad to see you apologized...

However you have not edited or deleted your post. Therefore your retarded comment (deliberate double entendre) will stand for eternity.

SAMIAM 07-25-2015 08:47 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Real BigGuy (Post 248984)
This whole "political correctness" thing really bugs me. I listened to a sports talk show the other day that talked about this for an hour. A SPORTS talk show.

It seems that there is a group of people who spend their time looking for things to be offended by. Every day it seems that we find new things we can't say. The way we are going, pretty soon there won't be a spectrum, just everyone a bland white (can I say that without offending someone?)

Unfortunately, I have no control over how anyone "hears what I am saying. 45 years ago I was interviewed by a sports writer who wrote a piece based on the interview. When I read it I was aghast. It was not at all what I thought I had said. My father told me not to worry, it wouldn't be the first time that people twisted my words to suit their needs/mores/upbringing.

When I use one of George Carlin's 7 deadly words in a burst of angry frustration at my performance of a task, I use it as a venting. This may not be right but, is it right that a person with a strict WASP/Catholic/Jewish/ etc. takes my words and bends them to their more repressed background?

Now, I try and engage my mind and take a look at the surroundings before I say something that may offend anyone. (I sometimes wonder if it is right that I have to try and be just like everyone else.) But I always think that everybody ought to try and be a little more tolerant, take care of their own issues, "skate their lane", and just lighten up!

Just the thoughts of an old guy who has seen a transition that may not be as great as some might think. Life is way to short to have to worry about all of these things.

Couldn't agree more about the PC police......funny how they are selective in the indignation and outrage over certain things.
Good example was Paula Dean.......had her career ruined for a remark she made 20 years ago. Same with Hulk Hogan. I don't know anyone who hasn't blurted out a nasty remark at some point in their lives.

That Guy 07-25-2015 12:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bear Islander (Post 249007)
I'm glad to see you apologized...

However you have not edited or deleted your post. Therefore your retarded comment (deliberate double entendre) will stand for eternity.

Honestly, I'm fine with that. I have nothing to hide.

chasedawg 07-25-2015 09:31 PM

enough
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by That Guy (Post 249021)
Honestly, I'm fine with that. I have nothing to hide.

Ok sorry "that guy" you are new to the forum and have made some IMOP strange remarks. So I must say good bye to you and your attitude. I don't see any added value in reading any of your comments.

Charlie T 07-25-2015 10:17 PM

Apology???
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by That Guy (Post 249021)
Honestly, I'm fine with that. I have nothing to hide.

That pretty well negates your "apology" that started this thread. Why bother?

mcdude 07-26-2015 07:17 AM

It's not so much politically incorrect as that it's hurtful. Take the pledge to stop using the "R" word
http://www.r-word.org/r-word-why-ple...x#.VbTO6vm-2zk

Bear Islander 07-26-2015 07:28 AM

By issuing an apology but refusing to delete your comment you show yourself to be a troll.


"In Internet slang, a troll is a person who sows discord on the Internet by starting arguments or upsetting people, by posting inflammatory, extraneous, or off-topic messages in an online community (such as a newsgroup, forum, chat room, or blog) with the deliberate intent of provoking readers into an emotional response or of otherwise disrupting normal on-topic discussion."

wifi 07-26-2015 07:46 AM

That's not how I read it
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Bear Islander (Post 249040)
By issuing an apology but refusing to delete your comment you show yourself to be a troll.

He admitted his mistake and left the mistake for everyone to see. The problem is that not everyone will read the whole thread and see his apology, and will laser in on that word we can't say.

On the other hand, if he edits his post, that is hides it, others have quoted him, so it doesn't make any difference what he does. Actually others will then call him a denier, its a no win.

Maybe he could say in his original post: Apology issued in post #x. I think that's the best outcome that can be expected.

jbolty 07-26-2015 08:11 AM

I'm a moderator on a forum with about 100,000 members and believe me lots of things are typed that users wish they could reel back. But as stated, the comments are quoted but others and it's out there.

IMHO the best option is a comment in the offending thread. Or, if it's bad enough the whole original tread could be either locked with an admin comment or disappeared all together.

That Guy 07-26-2015 08:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by wifi (Post 249041)
He admitted his mistake and left the mistake for everyone to see. The problem is that not everyone will read the whole thread and see his apology, and will laser in on that word we can't say.

On the other hand, if he edits his post, that is hides it, others have quoted him, so it doesn't make any difference what he does. Actually others will then call him a denier, its a no win.

Maybe he could say in his original post: Apology issued in post #x. I think that's the best outcome that can be expected.

Thank you.

I don't know what you want from me. I said something. It offended some people. I apologize for my actions. I'm not going go to go around trying to hide something I said. I made a mistake. I left it there for others to see/read.

Again, I used a phrase the was coined on the internet 10+ years ago to describe a debate on the internet, and it caused blowback on my behalf. Ya'll have my sincerest apologies and I shall refrain from all content on this particular forum that may cause offense to anyone.

MAXUM 07-26-2015 09:44 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by That Guy (Post 249048)
Thank you.

I don't know what you want from me. I said something. It offended some people. I apologize for my actions. I'm not going go to go around trying to hide something I said. I made a mistake. I left it there for others to see/read.

Again, I used a phrase the was coined on the internet 10+ years ago to describe a debate on the internet, and it caused blowback on my behalf. Ya'll have my sincerest apologies and I shall refrain from all content on this particular forum that may cause offense to anyone.

So let's just review how incredibly ridiculous this entire conversation has been.

You said something and some were offended.
You apologize and some were offended.
You further clarify your apology and still some are offended.
Hmm ... what next a goat sacrifice at the alter of the politically correct?

Is this or is this not completely silly? I'd rather hear what folks have to say, like it or not everyone has an opinion and as such in any open discussion some may not like what others have to say. Deal with it. Good grief I swear it's like witnessing a bunch of children squabbling back and forth... "mommy 'that guy' said 'retarded'" OH THE HORROR! Son you need to wash that mouth out with soap.

I'd find this somewhat entertaining if it wasn't so pathetic.

Sigh now who have I just offended... as if I really care! :rolleye2:

Senter Cove Guy 07-26-2015 10:44 AM

Holy crap. Please close or delete this thread.

Mink Islander 07-27-2015 07:49 PM

Pc
 
I think a lot of boors use the "anti pc" excuse to rationalize being rude offensive and obnoxious. The point is that the Internet has made it too easy to hide behind screen names and say things you'd never say in front of your mother. Just sayin.

Flame on!

topwater 08-18-2015 07:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bear Islander (Post 249007)
I'm glad to see you apologized...

However you have not edited or deleted your post. Therefore your retarded comment (deliberate double entendre) will stand for eternity.

I fine that word ( retarded ) to be very offense. You need to man up like That Guy did and apologize for using such foul language.

wifi 08-19-2015 07:29 AM

This thread is dead and buried, it should be locked :(


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