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Sue Doe-Nym 07-21-2019 07:40 PM

The New Woodshed
 
We just returned from a delectable dinner at The New Woodshed. Everything would have been perfect with 2 caveats, and this is where I expect to be slammed by some. #1) when did it become acceptable for a male to wear a hat indoors, particularly in a high end restaurant? #2) when did it become acceptable for parents to bring whiny, crying children to such a place, failing to take them outside for the sake of other diners? Maybe I am showing my age, but we never would have done either thing. This scenario bothered my daughter much more than it did me. Maybe I am a mean old bat, but what has happened to respect?
Okay, now let me have it.

joey2665 07-21-2019 08:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sue Doe-Nym (Post 315784)
We just returned from a delectable dinner at The New Woodshed. Everything would have been perfect with 2 caveats, and this is where I expect to be slammed by some. #1) when did it become acceptable for a male to wear a hat indoors, particularly in a high end restaurant? #2) when did it become acceptable for parents to bring whiny, crying children to such a place, failing to take them outside for the sake of other diners? Maybe I am showing my age, but we never would have done either thing. This scenario bothered my daughter much more than it did me. Maybe I am a mean old bat, but what has happened to respect?

Okay, now let me have it.

Absolutely agree on the hat and at a restaurant such as this I would say kids acceptable til 6-6:30 but no matter the time if they are disrupting others they should be taken outside until they calm down.


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Hillcountry 07-21-2019 08:34 PM

Manners and courtesy have gone out the window in recent years...seems the “me” generation and a large part of the population has not taught their kids the most basic of manners and etiquette in public. It will only get worse, I’m sure.
Meanwhile, try to tune out the distractions and enjoy your activities.
I’m old, so I don’t give a crap what anyone thinks of what I say anymore. :D

newposterguy 07-21-2019 08:44 PM

If you're going to bill yourself as fine dining, then I'd think some parameters would be in order. Anyone who shows up who isn't in proper dinner attire (hats, flip flops, t-shirts with writing on them) should be steered into the pub. Same with kids who are under the age of eight.

Or don't tout yourself as fine dining. No one wants to spend a couple of hundred dollars to look at slobs or listen to kids cry.

hd333 07-21-2019 08:55 PM

Agree on the hat piece, unless you are at a bar with games on or outside take it off.

Kids, depends on what time it is. People with kids have to eat too, but anytime after 7:00 in my opinion if your kids aren’t behaving wrap it up and take it home.


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kawishiwi 07-21-2019 09:05 PM

Hats?
 
Hats? Really? Someones hat ruins your $200 dinner?
Screaming unbehaved kids are obnoxious and physically affect you through sound and distraction, at least.
But a hat?
Try saying "that mans hat ruined my dinner" out loud three times, and, if you don't feel silly or break out laughing, you are seriously in need of professional help.

TheTimeTraveler 07-21-2019 09:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sue Doe-Nym (Post 315784)
We just returned from a delectable dinner at The New Woodshed. Everything would have been perfect with 2 caveats, and this is where I expect to be slammed by some. #1) when did it become acceptable for a male to wear a hat indoors, particularly in a high end restaurant? #2) when did it become acceptable for parents to bring whiny, crying children to such a place, failing to take them outside for the sake of other diners? Maybe I am showing my age, but we never would have done either thing. This scenario bothered my daughter much more than it did me. Maybe I am a mean old bat, but what has happened to respect?
Okay, now let me have it.

Actually, very good points....

Now talking about years ago; Do you ever see a gentlemen stand up when a lady gets up or sits down at a table ? I am not even sure that the younger folks are even aware of that once common custom.....

Sue Doe-Nym 07-21-2019 09:53 PM

The New Woodshed
 
Kawashiwi’s response is so idiotic that it doesn’t deserve a reply. Nobody’s $200 dinner was ruined by the male hat wearer. Not wearing a hat inside was taught to males as a sign of respect. It is or was common courtesy years ago and many of the older generation still follow that custom. So.....if you are not aware of good manners, please refrain from telling anyone else about needing professional help. Just please stay away from the nicer restaurants.

kawishiwi 07-21-2019 10:13 PM

For you...
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Sue Doe-Nym (Post 315792)
Kawashiwi’s response is so idiotic that it doesn’t deserve a reply. Nobody’s $200 dinner was ruined by the male hat wearer. Not wearing a hat inside was taught to males as a sign of respect. It is or was common courtesy years ago and many of the older generation still follow that custom. So.....if you are not aware of good manners, please refrain from telling anyone else about needing professional help. Just please stay away from the nicer restaurants.

Might I suggest pharmaceuticals for you?

thinkxingu 07-22-2019 04:50 AM

Though I take my hat off in restaurants out of habit, it's a pretty arbitrary/absurd "manner," especially seeing as women aren't equally expected to take theirs off. Maybe it's time to let that one go the same way as the "man should order for his date" one.

Loud kids are no different than loud patrons in general--they disturb others' experiences in favor of their own--but isn't that a sizable percentage of the issues we see in America in general?

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Slickcraft 07-22-2019 05:27 AM

Three years ago we went to the New Woodshed for our anniversary dinner and were disappointed with both food and service. A week later we had an excellent makeup dinner at the Lyon's Den. While I did not wear my usual hat, I certainly would not have noticed if anyone else had a hat on. Noisy kids would have been a bother.

Biggd 07-22-2019 05:55 AM

Manners and respect have all taken a slide since Twitter was invented. Now people say and do what ever they want without retribution.

joey2665 07-22-2019 06:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Biggd (Post 315805)
Manners and respect have all taken a slide since Twitter was invented. Now people say and do what ever they want without retribution.

Well said. There is absolutely nothing wrong with having manners and respecting others. Oh and by the way manners and respect do not cost any money.


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The Real BigGuy 07-22-2019 06:15 AM

Things change. Men used to wear hats (and jackets & ties) all the time. Families used to dine dressed at home together all the time. (Donna Reed’s (sp?) character & the family dinners on “Leave it to Beaver” weren’t far from the truth.). Pitchers used to go 9 innings and not get pulled after 100 pitches. Menused to wore jackets and ties to baseball games and women wore dresses.

I open doors for women & the elderly (never thought I’d be saying that word at my age) and try and respect others but I’ve also worn a hat in a restaurant occasionally.

Again things change. Not always for the better, but they change. You can flow with the river or be the rock. The rock eventually gets worn away.


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Marinalou 07-22-2019 06:29 AM

Children at Hign End Restaurants
 
Although children can be a distraction during a romantic dinner at a high end restaurant. Blaming the restaurant owners is way over the top. Given the discrimination laws that are in place if a restaurant operator were to attempt to bar children they would most likely be facing a discrimination claim at the most, and a public outcry at the least. I can envision protests, endless horrible Yelp reviews and months of lost business. The parents should be considerate and not bring young children to a place that is not suited for children to be children.

Biggd 07-22-2019 06:29 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Real BigGuy (Post 315807)
Things change. Men used to wear hats (and jackets & ties) all the time. Families used to dine dressed at home together all the time. (Donna Reed’s (sp?) character & the family dinners on “Leave it to Beaver” weren’t far from the truth.). Pitchers used to go 9 innings and not get pulled after 100 pitches. Menused to wore jackets and ties to baseball games and women wore dresses.

I open doors for women & the elderly (never thought I’d be saying that word at my age) and try and respect others but I’ve also worn a hat in a restaurant occasionally.

Again things change. Not always for the better, but they change. You can flow with the river or be the rock. The rock eventually gets worn away.


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I don't let someone wearing a hat in a restaurant bother me but loud uncontrolled whinny kids would.
You would get arrested today if people did what I did when my kids acted up in a restaurant. :eek::eek:

jeffk 07-22-2019 06:38 AM

While I might wish that people would dress well and leave the kids behind at a high end restaurant, I don't think there are many places left that actually enforce that. That has been true for a couple of decades now. Such places either gave up on rules or went out of business.

There was a restaurant in Derry, NH called Promises to Keep. The restaurant was the height of elegance, service, and food preparation. The setting, grounds, and room were beautiful. Men wore jackets and ties and the women wore nice dresses. Ill behaved children were nowhere to be found. There was staff for greeting, pouring water, seemingly every step of the meal. They were all dressed well, knew their jobs, and knew how to be polite and friendly. Each course was to die for, no matter what it was. You were guaranteed an excellent experience.

Sadly, one day we were seated and I noticed that a patron nearby was wearing a ratty old pair of sneakers. I was saddened as I recognized they no longer enforced a dress code. The plethora of service people were gone. It was still very good but that certain "je ne sais quoi" was gone. I had a sense of something special lost, never to return, like a death of a grandparent.

The restaurant soon became a event venue and by the ratings it has, a successful one.

I have only been in one other restaurant, in San Diego, that approached dining in this way and that is a loss. I'm sure there are more, probably some quite exclusive or limited access like a club, that function like this but wherever I go I look for them and cannot find a public restaurant that provides such a dining experience. Yes, many excellent places to eat but Promises to Keep spoiled me.

SAB1 07-22-2019 06:38 AM

The changed world we live in now. Only going to get worse. Once upon a time cops were spoken to with respect...yes sir no sir etc.......

rsmlp 07-22-2019 06:39 AM

behavior
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Biggd (Post 315810)
I don't let someone wearing a hat in a restaurant bother me but loud uncontrolled whinny kids would.
You would get arrested today if people did what I did when my kids acted up in a restaurant. :eek::eek:

And you should be.

Hillcountry 07-22-2019 06:47 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jeffk (Post 315813)
While I might wish that people would dress well and leave the kids behind at a high end restaurant, I don't think there are many places left that actually enforce that. That has been true for a couple of decades now. Such places either gave up on rules or went out of business.

There was a restaurant in Derry, NH called Promises to Keep. The restaurant was the height of elegance, service, and food preparation. The setting, grounds, and room were beautiful. Men wore jackets and ties and the women wore nice dresses. Ill behaved children were nowhere to be found. There was staff for greeting, pouring water, seemingly every step of the meal. They were all dressed well, knew their jobs, and knew how to be polite and friendly. Each course was to die for, no matter what it was. You were guaranteed an excellent experience.

Sadly, one day we were seated and I noticed that a patron nearby was wearing a ratty old pair of sneakers. I was saddened as I recognized they no longer enforced a dress code. The plethora of service people were gone. It was still very good but that certain "je ne sais quoi" was gone. I had a sense of something special lost, never to return, like a death of a grandparent.

The restaurant soon became a event venue and by the ratings it has, a successful one.

I have only been in one other restaurant, in San Diego, that approached dining in this way and that is a loss. I'm sure there are more, probably some quite exclusive or limited access like a club, that function like this but wherever I go I look for them and cannot find a public restaurant that provides such a dining experience. Yes, many excellent places to eat but Promises to Keep spoiled me.

Promises to Keep has a special place in my memory as my ex-wife was the hostess there. The owner’s were friends of ours and you are correct in saying it was once a special dining experience. Of course, all things change and so did “Promises”
I even got married to my 2nd wife there! (While it was still a special place!) :coolsm:

newposterguy 07-22-2019 07:18 AM

I don't recall anyone saying their dinner was ruined over a stranger wearing a hat, just that societal norms and decorum have declined.

It is well within a restaurant's power to post and enforce basic dining etiquette standards, and for those who are not dressed appropriately or have small children to be steered into the pub.

I guess it boils down to expecting people to do the right thing, and as a society, we fall short on some of the basics. If you have ever had the table next to the blowhard loudly talking on a cell phone at a restaurant or a child allowed to cry for longer than fifteen seconds, you know what I mean.

Phantom 07-22-2019 07:34 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Marinalou (Post 315809)
The parents should be considerate and not bring young children to a place that is not suited for children to be children.

I think that is the POINT. Modern day "parenting" has changed ! I see that in my own (older) children in the way they treat their offspring's.


The term "negotiating with terrorists" comes to mind when I watch them discipline their children.

Biggd 07-22-2019 07:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by newposterguy (Post 315820)
I don't recall anyone saying their dinner was ruined over a stranger wearing a hat, just that societal norms and decorum have declined.

It is well within a restaurant's power to post and enforce basic dining etiquette standards, and for those who are not dressed appropriately or have small children to be steered into the pub.

I guess it boils down to expecting people to do the right thing, and as a society, we fall short on some of the basics. If you have ever had the table next to the blowhard loudly talking on a cell phone at a restaurant or a child allowed to cry for longer than fifteen seconds, you know what I mean.

Dress codes in schools and in the work place has changed so it's to be expected in a restaurant, IMO. Even in the Woodshed where it's in a resort area.

sum-r breeze 07-22-2019 07:58 AM

Hmmmm...
 
What about a bad toupee? Should some of those be removed? Just asking for a friend....:laugh::laugh::laugh:

Biggd 07-22-2019 08:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rsmlp (Post 315815)
And you should be.

I guess my 3 kids turned out terrific in spite of me, not because of me? :rolleye2:
I have no regrets, esp after seeing many of the kids my children grew up with strung out on drugs, in the Billerica house of correction, or dead.
I just hope my 6 grandchildren turn out as good as their parents but I'm not sure if I'll be around to attest to that.
As for the Woodshed, I've only been there 3 times but at my last visit I wasn't impressed. I prefer O's in Laconia.

Biggd 07-22-2019 08:10 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sum-r breeze (Post 315829)
What about a bad toupee? Should some of those be removed? Just asking for a friend....:laugh::laugh::laugh:

That's one thing the younger generation got right. They just shave their heads. :laugh:

Woody38 07-22-2019 10:20 AM

Dining at the Lyons Den recently there was an elderly gent wearing a hat. I was brought up that one did not wear a hat at dinner unless we were female. Not that it bothered me but strange. Children is another story. Bad parenting. We had thanksgiving dinner at Dan'l Webster in Sandwich with our 5 and 8 year old sons. An elderly couple were taken to a table next to us and the lady asked if there was another table after seeing the boys. Answer this was the only table. This couple finished before we did and they made a point of commenting on how well behaved the boys were. We knew there would not be a problem. We all see young children roaming tables and being a nuisance. Bad parenting.

__________________________________

I am a retired workaholic and continuing aquaholic

thinkxingu 07-22-2019 10:48 AM

Let's also make the distinction between children and poorly behaved children--it's important for young people to learn how to behave in different settings, and there's only one way to do that. The difference (to me) is that there's a line between acceptable and unacceptable behavior, which is where parenting, and caring about others' experiences, comes in.

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hd333 07-22-2019 10:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by thinkxingu (Post 315844)
Let's also make the distinction between children and poorly behaved children--it's important for young people to learn how to behave in different settings, and there's only one way to do that. The difference (to me) is that there's a line between acceptable and unacceptable behavior, which is where parenting, and caring about others' experiences, comes in.

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I put it 100% on the parents. The kids don’t know any better.


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thinkxingu 07-22-2019 11:06 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by hd333 (Post 315846)
I put it 100% on the parents. The kids don’t know any better.


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My point is that some people are immediately critical of children in nice restaurants without giving them a chance, just as the example above captured.

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Hillcountry 07-22-2019 11:12 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Woody38 (Post 315842)
Dining at the Lyons Den recently there was an elderly gent wearing a hat. I was brought up that one did not wear a hat at dinner unless we were female. Not that it bothered me but strange. Children is another story. Bad parenting. We had thanksgiving dinner at Dan'l Webster in Sandwich with our 5 and 8 year old sons. An elderly couple were taken to a table next to us and the lady asked if there was another table after seeing the boys. Answer this was the only table. This couple finished before we did and they made a point of commenting on how well behaved the boys were. We knew there would not be a problem. We all see young children roaming tables and being a nuisance. Bad parenting.

__________________________________

I am a retired workaholic and continuing aquaholic

We might give the “elderly” man a pass on wearing hats in restaurants. There may well be a medical reason for an older man to keep his noggin protected...a cold draft from AC comes to mind! I know I have been uncomfortable in a similar situation and have asked to be moved because of the cold blast.
That, and I have been bald since my 20’s (no toupees either) ;)

Garcia 07-22-2019 12:00 PM

My general rule, and one that I try and instill in my children, is to be aware of the setting you are in, be tolerant of others, don’t make assumptions, and when out in public, my behavior should not negatively impact others’ experience.

To the points of the OP, someone wearing a hat in a fine restaurant - not something I would do and I would ask my children to remove theirs if they’re with me. Don’t wear hats inside - it’s the polite thing to do. That said, if someone wears one, it doesn’t negatively impact my dining experience.

Loud, unruly, boorish behavior, whether from a child or adult, does impact my experience and should not happen in a fine restaurant. If you’re loud and obnoxious in a bar or pub setting, it’s not something I do, but that can be part of the environment and I know that when I frequent a bar, pub, or other such establishment.

Being rude, condescending, or just a jerk is never okay.

mcdude 07-22-2019 12:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by newposterguy (Post 315820)
If you have ever had the table next to the blowhard loudly talking on a cell phone at a restaurant


.....and having the most ridiculous conversation. I get up and move if possible. What ever happened to bringing your phone conversation outside or to the lobby?

FlyingScot 07-22-2019 01:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mcdude (Post 315859)
.....and having the most ridiculous conversation. I get up and move if possible. What ever happened to bringing your phone conversation outside or to the lobby?

A better approach:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LtdpJlZ07u4

Phantom 07-22-2019 01:41 PM

Now THAT's funny ………

Thanks for making my afternoon & giving me a great idea for the next time!!

umbrellapoint 07-22-2019 02:21 PM

To contrast the Larry David method:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hqp1bGuiHHs

JEEPONLY 07-22-2019 04:38 PM

Never heard of Larry David- funny, funny stuff!!!

This whole thread makes me laugh, in a good sort of way.

Went to Lyons Den, first time ever, a week ago. The duck was delicious with the apricot sauce- great stuffing, too!

Anyway, the wife and I were going to go, alone, but her 37 y.o. son and his girlfriend decided to join us. As we left the house wifey says "You're not going to wear a hat, are you?" (Of course, I didn't). I like the eight-piecer style caddy cap- some call them scalley caps.

Guess who walks in to the restaurant wearing dark shades and the backward baseball cap- all through dinner. Nobody cared- he wasn't the only one. There were two 50s-ish guys wearing ball caps too- old looking jeans/tee shirts.

Yes, this was in the dining room.

Food and service were great- the waitress was a bit weird (kind of a nasally, yak-yaky voice, but very nice.

Someone here mentioned a lamb dish- that will be next!

Biggd 07-22-2019 06:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JEEPONLY (Post 315876)
Never heard of Larry David- funny, funny stuff!!!

This whole thread makes me laugh, in a good sort of way.

Went to Lyons Den, first time ever, a week ago. The duck was delicious with the apricot sauce- great stuffing, too!

Anyway, the wife and I were going to go, alone, but her 37 y.o. son and his girlfriend decided to join us. As we left the house wifey says "You're not going to wear a hat, are you?" (Of course, I didn't). I like the eight-piecer style caddy cap- some call them scalley caps.

Guess who walks in to the restaurant wearing dark shades and the backward baseball cap- all through dinner. Nobody cared- he wasn't the only one. There were two 50s-ish guys wearing ball caps too- old looking jeans/tee shirts.

Yes, this was in the dining room.

Food and service were great- the waitress was a bit weird (kind of a nasally, yak-yaky voice, but very nice.

Someone here mentioned a lamb dish- that will be next!

It's what I like about the lakes region, laid back, and unencumbered.
If you want to get dressed up that's fine but don't expect everyone else to conform to your high expectations as far as dress code goes, esp in the sweltering summer months.

eyenotall777 07-22-2019 08:21 PM

Hats
 
To me it depends on the type of hat. If it’s baseball type hat, I would lean towards being unacceptable. Then there is the dress hat for example, Scally Caps. Just keep in mind, you don’t know why a person may be wearing a hat, you are not them and do not know what they may be going through (Medical Wise) or trying to hide and feel comfortable and not missing out in company of others!! Most would more opt towards a dress type hat than baseball hat. Take this from personal experience....DONT JUDGE others regarding a hat and let it ruin your dining experience! Worry about yourself and if your Service/Food was acceptable and hope you are not experiencing what they maybe dealing with personally.

TiltonBB 07-23-2019 05:17 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sum-r breeze (Post 315829)
What about a bad toupee? Should some of those be removed? Just asking for a friend....:laugh::laugh::laugh:

Many toupee's should never be worn in the first place! It is always funny to see someone with a bad, obvious, toupee. I guess you don't notice the good ones, as it should be.

I know someone whose toupee looks like a squirrel died on his head. He has no idea how bad it looks. From 100 feet away it is very obvious. (Tell him? Don't mention it?)

We should all learn to accept change and grow old gracefully.

The Real BigGuy 07-23-2019 06:43 AM

Agree Tilton! People always saying, “you should color your hair” or do this or that to look younger. Why? To attract the chicks?That time has passed and taint never coming back. My response has always been “Nope, time for me to grow old and fat gracefully.” Been successful at both[emoji16]


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Hillcountry 07-23-2019 07:34 AM

1 Attachment(s)
Quote:

Originally Posted by TiltonBB (Post 315885)
Many toupee's should never be worn in the first place! It is always funny to see someone with a bad, obvious, toupee. I guess you don't notice the good ones, as it should be.

I know someone whose toupee looks like a squirrel died on his head. He has no idea how bad it looks. From 100 feet away it is very obvious. (Tell him? Don't mention it?)

We should all learn to accept change and grow old gracefully.

One of the best comedies of all time...here’s “Lewis” from Christmas vacation.

swnoel 07-23-2019 08:06 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kawishiwi (Post 315790)
Hats? Really? Someones hat ruins your $200 dinner?
Screaming unbehaved kids are obnoxious and physically affect you through sound and distraction, at least.
But a hat?
Try saying "that mans hat ruined my dinner" out loud three times, and, if you don't feel silly or break out laughing, you are seriously in need of professional help.

I always remove my MAGA hat when I set down to enjoy fine dining at McDonald's. I thought everyone did. Those deplorables are ruining our country...

sky's 07-23-2019 08:22 AM

Meredith needs a Steak House just a steak house. Woodshed has a nice environment in fact went there saturday night good meal but not blown away by any means not slamming there efforts but i wont go thru withdrawels if i don't return any time soon.

loonguy 07-23-2019 08:35 AM

The problem with the current Woodshed is that it is not the old Woodshed with all its ambience and character before it burned down. Going to the new Woodshed reminds us how much we miss the old Woodshed.

ApS 07-23-2019 08:37 AM

Old Thread—Same Restaurant Topic—Not Locked...
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Woody38 (Post 315842)
Dining at the Lyons Den recently there was an elderly gent wearing a hat. I was brought up that one did not wear a hat at dinner unless we were female. Not that it bothered me but strange. Children is another story. Bad parenting. We had thanksgiving dinner at Dan'l Webster in Sandwich with our 5 and 8 year old sons. An elderly couple were taken to a table next to us and the lady asked if there was another table after seeing the boys. Answer this was the only table. This couple finished before we did and they made a point of commenting on how well behaved the boys were. We knew there would not be a problem. We all see young children roaming tables and being a nuisance. Bad parenting.

You've reminded me of a humorous thread from 13 years ago :) . The question is quoted below:

Quote:

"What should a customer do if their meal is being ruined by a disruptive table. I was at a nearly empty restaurant (it was Super Bowl Sunday and the Pats were playing...figured it was a perfect time for a non-football fan to celebrate finishing her MS degree at a normally "3-hour wait" restaurant). The only other party there consisted of 4 adults and 2 children, who were allowed by the adults to have the run of the restaurant. One of the girls was named "Artemis" which I know because I must have heard her name 1000 times..."Artemis, stop...Artemis, come here...Artemis, sit down." Should I have complained to my server or the manager about this other table, especially since this was a higher-end establishment?

Thanks for any advice,"

https://www.winnipesaukee.com/forums...ad.php?p=37801
Today, Artemis is nearing her 20's: What would she think of her parents "discipline"? :rolleye2:

upthesaukee 07-23-2019 11:42 AM

Interesting Thread
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Sue Doe-Nym (Post 315784)
We just returned from a delectable dinner at The New Woodshed. Everything would have been perfect with 2 caveats, and this is where I expect to be slammed by some. #1) when did it become acceptable for a male to wear a hat indoors, particularly in a high end restaurant? #2) when did it become acceptable for parents to bring whiny, crying children to such a place, failing to take them outside for the sake of other diners? Maybe I am showing my age, but we never would have done either thing. This scenario bothered my daughter much more than it did me. Maybe I am a mean old bat, but what has happened to respect?
Okay, now let me have it.

Sue Doe-nym, I'm showing my age as well. Having read most of the posts to this point, I find myself totally archaic. I have been married to the same lady for a few months shy of 50 years. Starting in my pre-teen years, I was taught to open car doors for women, hold doors into buildings for women and other folks right behind us ("nice job, lousy pay, but I meet nice people.), I will help my wife with her chair, I do order for my wife if it's just the two especially in a nice restaurant, I wear a ball cap of one sort or another, but not in a restaurant, wear a coat and tie to wakes, funerals, weddings, etc unless specified "casual ", and I could go on and on. It is how I was raised, along with civility, respect, and kindness.
Of course, that was back "in the good old days", which may have pretty good after all.

Dave

JEEPONLY 07-23-2019 01:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by eyenotall777 (Post 315884)
Then there is the dress hat for example, Scally Caps.

Thanks for saying this- My wife calls them my "Old man's hats"- Got tweed, wool and cotton versions.

Mr. V 07-23-2019 01:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sue Doe-Nym (Post 315784)
#1) when did it become acceptable for a male to wear a hat indoors, particularly in a high end restaurant?

While I understand that etiquette says "no hats indoors," in reality I see no basis in fact for this.

What does it matter, really, whether someone is wearing a hat in a restaurant?

Newbiesaukee 07-23-2019 03:12 PM

I believe that the first translated Egyptian hieroglyphics from 3000 BC revealed Pharaoh’s complaint that the younger generation was disrespectful. :)

TiltonBB 07-23-2019 09:45 PM

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And if your head becomes too big for your cap:

https://www.bigheadcaps.com/

gillygirl 07-25-2019 10:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jeffk (Post 315813)
While I might wish that people would dress well and leave the kids behind at a high end restaurant, I don't think there are many places left that actually enforce that. That has been true for a couple of decades now. Such places either gave up on rules or went out of business.

There was a restaurant in Derry, NH called Promises to Keep. The restaurant was the height of elegance, service, and food preparation. The setting, grounds, and room were beautiful. Men wore jackets and ties and the women wore nice dresses. Ill behaved children were nowhere to be found. There was staff for greeting, pouring water, seemingly every step of the meal. They were all dressed well, knew their jobs, and knew how to be polite and friendly. Each course was to die for, no matter what it was. You were guaranteed an excellent experience.

Sadly, one day we were seated and I noticed that a patron nearby was wearing a ratty old pair of sneakers. I was saddened as I recognized they no longer enforced a dress code. The plethora of service people were gone. It was still very good but that certain "je ne sais quoi" was gone. I had a sense of something special lost, never to return, like a death of a grandparent.

The restaurant soon became a event venue and by the ratings it has, a successful one.

I have only been in one other restaurant, in San Diego, that approached dining in this way and that is a loss. I'm sure there are more, probably some quite exclusive or limited access like a club, that function like this but wherever I go I look for them and cannot find a public restaurant that provides such a dining experience. Yes, many excellent places to eat but Promises to Keep spoiled me.

I got married at Promises to Keep. A friend opened up the wedding card she was giving us and wrote a bigger check because she thought it was so lovely!


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